Indeed it is. Reaper can get a thread of 1,000+ responses just by cutting slack. But if I want a successful thread, I have to come out with a new episode every week! Go figure! This is the OT Sitcom and management has decided to bring back the program for another season.
"Primitive Backpacking" and "Holland Border Patrol" were both canceled for various reasons, which no doubt influenced their choice to throw us idiots back on the air. Kam is back as Head Writer and he's making a salary larger than I can ever hope to pay him. I can barely pay my taxes as it is! So tune in and get our ratings up before I'm taken into custody by the IRS!
The camera pans to Bomb, who’s playing with the guard dog’s puppies. One puppy in particular stands out. It has the same spot at its eyes like Lassie, Ficko’s old dog.
Right as the audience notices this, the camera zooms out and looks over the new OT capital. The few buildings that are there, are still new.
This city is many times smaller than the OT capitals of WaW and BO. The MW2 capital has been overrun by noobs and is now a smoldering ruin of what might have been a great city in the future.
A few old characters are seen, alongside unfamiliar faces.
The camera turns to the new OTPD office.
Weird: So, chief, who has returned?
Chest: Bomb, of course. Horror just got back, but his war wounds from the Great CoD War are still being treated. Daniel moved in recently. I believe that’s about it. Oh yeah, Reaper has been spotted being drunk at the bar a few times.
Weird: I see. Not a lot. We’re still missing a lot of guys, like Peter, Major, Loudhawk, Soy, Snake, Void, EviL, Jedi and Plati.
Chest: I know, it’s a shame, really. Although we have a new supervisor, Jeepchick. She’s alright. Understands how things work down here.
Just before Weird can say anything, they are startled by cries of joy coming from the Castle. The OT police officers go check it out, only to find Bomb rolling over the ground, tears of joy rolling down his cheek.
Bomb: LASSIE! LASSIE, YOU’RE BACK!
Chest: Bomb, what the hell are you doing, get back up, fool. Your uniform is all dirty. And you know very well that Lassie has gone missing under mysterious circumstances, a long time ago!
Bomb: No! Chest, look at this pup, it’s like Lassie, but only more Lassie-er!
To show his affection, Bomb begins to pet the pup, mumbling some incoherent words. Chest and Weird glance at each other, not sure what to do.
Weird: C’mon Bomb, get a hold of yourself. It can’t be Lassie, I killed he- I.. Uh... I mean, she ran away, remember? Ficko was devastated!
Bomb: Weird, look at her! Look!
Bomb shows Lassie to the duo. They both stare at it in bewilderment.
Chest: No, no, it can’t be! This pup... It MUST be Lassie, there’s just too much resemblance!
As the three are pondering over how this is possible, Pic, who’s on guard duty, sees a figure running towards the city gates.
Pic: Kam! Open the gate, you damn fool, someone’s trying to get in!
Kam: I don’t hear no bell, Pic, you’re pulling another prank on me, aren’t ya? I haven’t forgotten the last time someone “left a package outside”! I won’t step outside, just to find the gates locked behind my back again!
The audience bursts out in laughter.
Pic: Open your eyes, you halfwit, someone’s running at the gate!
Kam: I ain’t opening no gates, idiot! Open your own damn gates if you want, but I ain’t having no part in it!
OT’s Staff Sergeant, Crafty, runs towards the duo.
Crafty: Now what the hell is all this Mickey Mouse @#&§ for? JOKER! Why in God’s name aren’t you watching the Wastes? PYLE! Sweet Mary Jesus son of Joseph, why on EARTH are you not standing watch at the gate?!
Pic (cowering): Sir... Sir, there’s someone running at the gate, so I told Kam to open it up, but he won’t believe me, sir!
Kam: Sir, I am not falling for another one of his pranks again, sir!
Crafty: Alright ladies, listen to me and listen good! You maggots make me want to vomit! I’m coming up there Joker, and I’ll stomp your guts out if there’s no one there!
Crafty does as he speaks. He sees the mysterious figure running towards the walls.
Crafty: PYLE! You have dishonoured yourself and the platoon! I have tried helping you and I have failed! From now on, whenever you screw up, I will not punish you, I will punish your platoon! And the way I see it ladies, you owe me for insubordination! Now what is your major malfunction, numbnuts?! Did mommy and daddy not show you enough attention?!
Sergeant Crafty’s harsh treatment made sure Private Kam got a hold of himself. The platoon hated him, and Kam was going to find out sooner or later.
The mysterious figure running at the gates seems like Ficko. Crafty doesn’t know what to make of this. As Ficko nears the city, the camera fades out.
I like how I take on role similar to Lee Ermey. Keep it up.
Good stuff Kam. I killed..erm.. Excellent reading while working.